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How to take care of your computer
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How to make freshly squeezed lemon juice
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Today i woke up with my eyes wide open, last night i went to sleep with my eyes wide shut
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I am getting crazy in here, let me out of this mental institution.
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Mmm, i love drinking coffee before bed
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How many light bulbs do it take to change a light bulb
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Wow, that trucks headlights almost blinded me this afternoon
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What gets passed around, a joint
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Does it ever occur to you that we are here.
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The things people do to look cool
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I understand that you have been talking about me.
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Why did the chicken cross the road?
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A chicken a day keeps the bullies at bay
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Darkness is surrounding me, well turn on the light then
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Recent scientific studies report that monkeys like to climb trees.
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Public speech entitled, i am a recluse
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I cant understand a single word the milk daddy says
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How to have your cake and eat it
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What do you do when you fall over?
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Cheese makes the world go round
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Anything you do say will be used against you in this relationship
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Lets go to the local church rave
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A bit of wisdom from wise ol’ richie
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If you see a big puddle, walk around it. No heroics or you will be trippin’ head first
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I went to the woods today, it gifts clarity.
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I went to the zoo because i like wild animals.
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Don’t get me wrong, i love her dearly but sometimes…
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I didn’t know bulls like china shops
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The car broke down, it’s hit the wall.
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When half of your hair is sitting on the table You are probably a bit stressed.
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Are you in touch with your inner gorilla?
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Once there was a man from the city
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Totally cheesy fight scene, hilarious
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Wow, i genuinely didn’t know that pigs can fly.
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Joe bloggs has written something on my facebook wall
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Caution, this vehicle is reversing, get out of the bloody way
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OMG this stress free life is doing my head in.
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I am on the train to nowhere because the bugger broke down
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I think it’s great how trains choo choo
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I went to the doctor and he diagnosed me of hypochondria, but didn’t suggest any meds.
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One of my comedy silent movies
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My name is Richard and i am addicted to laughter
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Again, i didn’t quite catch that.
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I do not understand your sense of humour
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The city that never sleeps, zzzzzzz
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Funny Lenny Henry stand up sketch
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Seize the day, forget last night
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When your mind is racing, wear a helmet
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I am currently studying at the university of life
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What to do when you spill coffee over your computer
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If the prime minister refused to resign would that make him a dictator or an a-hole
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Power walks are great when you are late
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There is a chicken from kentucky
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Pet hates usually cover anything but your actual pets
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A builder goes to the doctor with complaints of pain from passing bricks.
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Every silver lining has a Thor ruining someone’s day
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I ordered breakfast in bed for two
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Nightmares are a real nightmare
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Apples are good for your health, do not go near them
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All those who aren’t present put your hands up
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I have a mac, it is yellow and is great in the rain
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Opening scene from Team America world police
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