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Happy birthday songs are not always happy
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Waiter, there is a hare in my stew.
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You are always picking my brain
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I do not understand your sense of humour
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A builder goes to the doctor with complaints of pain from passing bricks.
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My bone is broken in three places
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The city that never sleeps, zzzzzzz
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Funny Tracy Morgan interview for time magazine.
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I bought an apple, i kept it in my mac. But i crushed it in the hard drive home.
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Do not forget why you are here
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Do you ever feel like pinning a tail on a donkey?
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The lord giveth, but wants it back with interest.
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Recent scientific studies report that monkeys like to climb trees.
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I wanted to get the word out so i told my friends to keep it secret.
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Opening scene from Team America world police
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I think they’re an odd looking pair of socks
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Wow, the sun is so bright tonight
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The car broke down, it’s hit the wall.
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I am impossible, stop dreaming about me.
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How to take care of your computer
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Religion is so not rock and roll
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Getting old is like the metaphorical car
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I have got something to show you
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I didn’t know bulls like china shops
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I was named after a great leader of men, they call me Barbara.
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One of my comedy silent movies
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Video of Tim Minchin getting serious about prejudice
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If the prime minister refused to resign would that make him a dictator or an a-hole
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I am a chain smoker, aluminium is the best
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I am buying my time, how does £1000 sound?
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How to find out who ate your pickled onion
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What did the guy say to the bar tender?
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I went to the shop after hours, but it was closed.
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The royal mint is only open after eight
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Alec Baldwin talks about his Team America character
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Single celled amoebas are really small
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I am really struggling to understand the etymology of the human race
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I don’t know what to say, but i’ll say it anyway
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Love thy neighbour, i mean she is hot
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Proof that footballers don’t have legs
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What is bright and at the end of the tunnel
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How to have your cake and eat it
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Reverse psychology never works
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Joe bloggs has written something on my facebook wall
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The biggest oversight by law enforcement.
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The taxi is early, hurry time is money
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Pet hates usually cover anything but your actual pets
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The funniest joke in the world
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If life gives you chocolate, eat it
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How many light bulbs do it take to change a light bulb
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Pandora’s box is full of Christmas goodies
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The server crashed. OMG i hope he’s ok. As you can clearly see, i like to talk.
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Ok, the powers that be decided that i should only do one liners. So here you go, just one line.
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OMG this stress free life is doing my head in.
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Day becomes night, and night becomes another f**king work day
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Did you know that lions like to sleep?
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My fish and chips are undercooked, the haddock swam off the plate
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Frodo is going through a strange transition
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