Clucking hell
I live right next to a hen enclosure
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Suggestions for school teacher dress codes
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Wow, i genuinely didn’t know that pigs can fly.
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Duel in a graveyard, 1,2,3,4,5, oops
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I like playing jazz music to people who hate coffee shops
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I have no idea why you are here.
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An ocean of grass, right which one of you flooded the field?
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I know a great game called 52 card pick up
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Back in the day before it got dark.
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How many light bulbs do it take to change a light bulb
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If only i had accepted that deal
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It has recently come to my attention that discrimination needs to be quarantined.
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The things people do to look cool
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One step forward two steps back.
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If i could be anyone for a day it would be doctor who
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A chicken a day keeps the bullies at bay
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Joe bloggs has written something on my facebook wall
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How to make the perfect coffee
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Pet hates usually cover anything but your actual pets
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The town was very busy today, especially when i went in on the wrong side.
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Ever been caught naked on the lawn?
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Wow, that theory on copper mining is so deep
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Again, i didn’t quite catch that.
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Get the tea on, don’t forget the vodka
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Man orders blue steak but it jumps off the plate and walks away
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Drop me a line, i’m stuck down here
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The taxi is early, hurry time is money
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I think they’re an odd looking pair of socks
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I like to go treasure hunting, it keeps me honest
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I love playing my guitar, the open G gives the best sound
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I bought an apple, i kept it in my mac. But i crushed it in the hard drive home.
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It is nothing personal, just business
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Reverse psychology never works
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Do not shout at me, i am delicate
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Stop it, your driving me over the edge
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Sometimes bull shit takes over
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Johnny Vegas gets shouted down
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If life gives you chocolate, eat it
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If you have no life, you might live longer
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Happy birthday songs are not always happy
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Very funny Lee Evans instrument mime
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If the prime minister refused to resign would that make him a dictator or an a-hole
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The server crashed. OMG i hope he’s ok. As you can clearly see, i like to talk.
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Harry potter spoof, the Hogwarts hangover (18+)
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This guy seriously needs a beer.
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Good things come to those who take
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I am impossible, stop dreaming about me.
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OMG this stress free life is doing my head in.
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I’ve just gone into business with a monkey
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I got myself locked up to escape from my wife.
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Did you know that lions like to sleep?
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The biggest oversight by law enforcement.
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I have a mac, it is yellow and is great in the rain
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Seize the day, forget last night
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I have the power to move mountains, on a map
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If you moved any slower you would go back in time
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What gets passed around, a joint
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My flight was cancelled so i got the bus
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I was walking my pet lion today
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Cheese makes the world go round
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Waiter, there is a hare in my stew.
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There is a chicken from kentucky
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If you rock the boat your friends might slap you with the oars
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I have no idea what you are saying.
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The lord giveth, but wants it back with interest.
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