I have a mac, it is yellow and is great in the rain
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The biggest oversight by law enforcement.
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I like to go treasure hunting, it keeps me honest
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The taxi is early, hurry time is money
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If you rock the boat your friends might slap you with the oars
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The lord giveth, but wants it back with interest.
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Wow, i genuinely didn’t know that pigs can fly.
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A chicken a day keeps the bullies at bay
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I didn’t know bulls like china shops
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Coffee is evil and reptiles are insane
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If i had a nice car i would be very surprised
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Lamp that fool, put him into the darkness
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I have no idea why you are here.
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Do not forget why you are here
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Now listen, i will only say this once
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Lend me your ear, i promise i’ll give it back
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Good things come to those who take
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How long is a piece of string?
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I am getting crazy in here, let me out of this mental institution.
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If i had just one wish i would wish for another one.
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I went to the shop after hours, but it was closed.
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The problem with locking people up and throwing away the key
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I have no idea what you are saying.
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Hay fever is popping round to say hello
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If you are rich i applaud you, now buy me a drink
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I wanted to see if i could fly so i jumped off the pavement
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Wow, that theory on copper mining is so deep
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People in love are very good landscapers
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Johnny Vegas gets shouted down
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My car has died, but at least i dont have to pay for a funeral.
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OMG this stress free life is doing my head in.
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The town was very busy today, especially when i went in on the wrong side.
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I am really struggling to understand the etymology of the human race
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Sometimes bull shit takes over
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Do you ever feel like pinning a tail on a donkey?
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Proof that footballers don’t have legs
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A bit of wisdom from wise ol’ richie
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If you see a big puddle, walk around it. No heroics or you will be trippin’ head first
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The things people do to look cool
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My bone is broken in three places
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Don’t you think it’s cool how all monkeys look like king kong?
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If life gives you lemons, buy tequila
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If you cant sing then try not to speak
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I hate songs that just repeat the same one line vocals
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I like cars, i like to ride them down the hill.
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If i was ten years younger, i would be under age
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If i had a pound for every time you said that
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He woke up, it had all been a dream
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The bartender really doesn’t like you
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Alec Baldwin talks about his Team America character
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Suggestions for school teacher dress codes
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Will all of the world leaders follow me please
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The Amazing Lyrebird of Australia – Unseen Footage
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Are you in touch with your inner gorilla?
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I hate everything to do with being good
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Top three ways to get a girls attention
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You are always picking my brain
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It has recently come to my attention that discrimination needs to be quarantined.
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If you have no life, you might live longer
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