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If life gives you lemons, buy tequila
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If you have no life, you might live longer
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Video of Tim Minchin getting serious about prejudice
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If the prime minister refused to resign would that make him a dictator or an a-hole
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Sticks and stones may break my bones but bullets will surely kill me
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The lord giveth, but wants it back with interest.
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I am one sandwich short of an afternoon tea
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Sunrises don’t set, they do if you’re painting them
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Cruising with the car top down
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Wow, the sun is so bright tonight
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If i was ten years younger, i would be under age
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Joe bloggs has written something on my facebook wall
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A chicken a day keeps the bullies at bay
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The taxi is early, hurry time is money
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Does this top make my ass look fat
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Lend me your ear, i promise i’ll give it back
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I went to the woods today, it gifts clarity.
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Now everybody loves to see videos of people hurting themselves
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I was walking my pet lion today
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Frodo is going through a strange transition
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How to have your cake and eat it
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OMG this stress free life is doing my head in.
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If i had a nice car i would be very surprised
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Do you hear what i wrote on the wall
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One step forward two steps back.
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Love thy neighbour, i mean she is hot
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The funniest joke in the world
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The world makes money go round
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How many light bulbs do it take to change a light bulb
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Are you in touch with your inner gorilla?
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People in love are very good landscapers
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Dont put all of your eggs in one backet
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The royal mint is only open after eight
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It’s never too late, i mean ask this old codger
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This guy seriously needs a beer.
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Someone suggested i take anger management classes, he wont be saying that again
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I do not understand your sense of humour
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Apples are good for your health, do not go near them
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I am a chain smoker, aluminium is the best
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First to the finish line is a rotten egg
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Funny pottery video, Johnny Vegas
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How long is a piece of string?
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One of my comedy silent movies
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Haiku’s can be deeply funny y’all.
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I put my blood, sweat and tears into that soup
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Wow, i genuinely didn’t know that pigs can fly.
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I was born with a wooden spoon up my arse
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I wanted to see if i could fly so i jumped off the pavement
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I’m getting too old for this retirement lark
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Public speech entitled, i am a recluse
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You have made your bed now jump on it
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I rocked the mic, sorry i will pay to have it repaired
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I just finished reading an excellent book, the actors did a fantastic job
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I have no idea why you are here.
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What do you say to a woman who is doing her nails?
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The server crashed. OMG i hope he’s ok. As you can clearly see, i like to talk.
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Team America – love scene (18+)
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Coffee is evil and reptiles are insane
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Recent scientific studies report that monkeys like to climb trees.
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That punch has got a really strong kick
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If you see a big puddle, walk around it. No heroics or you will be trippin’ head first
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Single celled amoebas are really small
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What did the guy say to the bar tender?
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If only i had accepted that deal
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What to do when you spill coffee over your computer
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I went to the shop after hours, but it was closed.
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